Note: Sexual assault/Rape is something I take extremely seriously. I personally know women who have been attacked. I teach female self-defense and I have spoken on how women can better defend themselves. Most importantly, I will never believe it was the victim’s fault she was attacked. It was nobody’s fault except the attacker. Plain and simple.

To those who have not heard, earlier this year a Toronto police officer made a flippant comment that women should avoid dressing like “sluts” to avoid being raped or victimized. This comment sparked outrage in some groups who have organized “SlutWalk’s.”

Conclusion (for the impatient out there): SlutWalk’s serve no purpose other than affording people another event besides Halloween to wear minimal clothing.

As you can possibly garner from the photo, SlutWalk’s are a march of self-proclaimed “sluts.” They are taking the word back. With pride! Now, people can’t use the word slut to hurt them anymore. They’ve owned it. “We’re Here! We’re Slutty! Get used to it!” Ok, unfortunately “queer” and “here” rhyme a bit better but you get the idea.

The concept of these SlutWalk’s are simple: Women should be able to wear whatever they want, whenever they want, and never feel in danger of being victimized in any sort of way. Love it, sounds great. If not for reality, I think it’s a feasible goal.

People rely on their perceptions to make conclusions. It’s how we survive in society. You see something, make a judgment, and act (or choose not to act) based on that judgment. You see a shirt you want on sale in your favorite department store, you want it, you buy it. You see an overweight person eating a bucket of fried chicken, you assume that was not their first bucket of fried chicken in their life, you judge they are an over-eater. You see a woman in extremely revealing clothing drunk at a bar, one will most likely judge it is not her first time drunk at a bar and furthermore she is not a neurosurgeon (although I am sure there are some wild, partying neurosurgeon’s out there). Are you right all the time? Of course not. But people don’t have time to reevaluate their perceptions. There is a reason first impressions are so powerful, not to mention lasting.

Back to the situation at hand: it is tough to argue that there is not a positive correlation between how “slutty” a woman appears and how much attention she receives. Men, in general, are hunting in a way when they go out. Not to the same degree sexual predators hunt but the thought process is somewhat similar. Again, sweeping generalization, but when a man sees a woman dressed provocatively, he is more likely to treat the woman how he perceives her (“slutty”). She is dressed differently than other women and thus she must be different (crude rationale by a man). Is this hypothetical woman a “slut” in any sense of the word? Maybe. BUT, most importantly, she is not a “slut” in any sense of the word just because she is dressed a certain way. The only important thing to note is that this is how a man will most likely perceive her. Armed with this perception, a man is more likely to disrespect/be more forward with that woman than a woman dressed more conservatively. The man could now improperly feel comfortable touching, grabbing, or speak to her in an extremely lewd manner (I’ve always wanted to use the word “lewd” in a post).

Whore’s Uniform

Does this man have any right to do this? Absolutely not. Does that change the outcome? Absolutely not. The reality is, where there is alcohol, men, and women, men will do stupid things. Maybe if every single woman dressed “slutty” then it wouldn’t shock some men and some women would not get more attention merely for the outfit they choose. But for now, if a woman would like to minimize the amount of unwanted attention, she could reasonably not dress “slutty.” Does she have every right to? Absolutely. Doesn’t change the fact that it will bring more attention.

It is an ugly world out there. Many people, thankfully, are sheltered from how much evil there is. It exists. It is ruthless, careless, and causes true pain without regard. For example, and apropos to this post, in San Mateo gang members shot innocent people wearing red, the color of a rival gang. This same atrocity has happened numerous times throughout the years. The gang members saw people wearing a certain color, made a judgment, and shot to kill. Did those gang members have any right to do this? Absolutely not. Did that stop one of the victimes from dying and three being severely wounded? Absolutely not. Did those kids have every right to wear red that day? Of course. Was it their fault they were shot? NO. That said, if I lived in that area, I would never ever wear red. Plain and simple.

How does this all relate to actual sexual assaults and rape? It is well documented that sexual assaults are not crimes of passion or lust. They are crimes of anger, control, and power. These attackers are considered (and should be viewed) as predators. That’s what they are. The term “sexual predator” is embedded in the vernacular for a reason. Predators do one thing and one thing well: look for prey. Predator’s do not look for other predators or prey that could possibly hurt them or cause them problems. They want easy. They want to accomplish their goal while being in power. They already feel weak inside, they want to feel strong for once. If dressing provocatively increased your chances of being noticed by a predator and thus of being assaulted 5% is it worth it? Even if it increased it 1%? .1%? .01%? Weigh that increase against the desire to wear whatever clothes you want.

Is this fair? Of course not. Is it the reality? Yes. Just like those kids wearing red did nothing to deserve being shot, a woman wearing “slutty” clothes did NOTHING TO DESERVE being attacked. What does that change, though? Life is not fair.

Organizers of the SlutWalk’s desire change. They want to live in a world where a woman can wear whatever she wants and be just as safe and protected as a woman who is dressed conservatively. I applaud that desire. Organizing marches of half-naked people do absolutely nothing to address that fact. Absolutely nothing. You think a rapist sees these marches and says, “oh wow, I completely misjudged that girl I attacked!” These marches cannot be compared to Gay Pride marches because gays were silent and the marches were a loud shout that they are not a few, they are many and they’re not going anywhere. They were shouting to the “hetero world” to recognize and accept them. Who are these self-proclaimed “sluts” shouting to? Toronto police officers? Men? Women? Who is listening that will change the basic act of predators and prey?

Final thoughts: why is being slutty even something women desire to “take back?” How is this a positive goal in any sense of the word? Being sexual and slutty are completely different things. If a woman is comfortable with her sexuality and wants to enjoy sex responsibly, great. Dressing like an out of work street walker demanding to be called a slut should not be an attractive ideal. Is “slut” overused in our society? Sure. A woman has sex with a few guys and people could call her a slut. Ok. Sucks for her. Society will get right on fixing the entire double standard between men and women. But for now, the over and incorrect use of the word slut has absolutely NOTHING TO DO WITH WOMEN BEING ATTACKED.

Sexual assault and rape is supposedly down over the years. Personally I believe it is being under reported more than ever. These SlutWalk’s do nothing to address that fact. “Hey girls who have been attacked…keep wearing slutty clothes or if you aren’t, go ahead and dress as slutty as you like because…because…because…?” Why exactly? Because you should be able to?

Kids should also be able to wear red and not get killed.

Looking to clean up my blog, CoolSlice…anybody a slick WordPress designer?

Guy destroys about $250K of precious vodka in about 2 seconds.  Respect.

Who said forklifts were dangerous…?

After many, many years on the Blogger software it was time for a chance.  CoolSlice needed to branch out.

I was worried about the switch.  Would I lose some precious comments?  Would I lose my entire blog?  Well…could not have been easier.

Move from Blogger to WordPress:

1.  Log into your Blogger account, Settings, Basic tab, Export blog.  Save the .xml file to your computer
2.  Go to the awesome Blogger2Wordpress site and import your recently saved Blogger.xml file
3.  Now log into your new WordPress account, Tools, Import, WordPress, browse to your recently created WordPress file and BOOM.  Congrats, you’re now on WordPress.  Not too shabby.

As always, please feel free to send me any suggestions on the blog.  Design related, widget requests, topics, etc.  ANYTHING.

PS.  WordPress is awesome.